How Do You Talk to a Doubting Adolescent?

The best place to start is to ask your child why he is having doubts about God’s existence that he didn’t have at an earlier age. Then you could proceed from there, perhaps discussing how in your lifetime you questioned God’s existence but worked through the crisis, or provide an example of a friend or relative who did so.

Does your child go to a Catholic school? A Catholic school should be able to help in this regard, including with the help of compassionate student leaders. Ditto with parish youth groups. And if your child is too young for the parish youth group, I’m sure some of the student leaders in that group would be willing to reach out as an apostolic work to your child. Connect with your pastor and parish youth minister on this.

You know how that goes sometimes. Unfortunately, peers—or people closer to their age—often have more credibility in the eyes of adolescents than do their parents.

Have there been traumatic events in your child’s life? Family disruption, such as through divorce, can negatively impact a child’s view about God, since they have experienced alienation in the one place they thought would be safest for them. If you’re a single parent, though, don’t be discouraged. Live a joyfully faithful Catholic life and seek the support of other joyfully faithful Catholic families in your parish. Joyful Catholicism is a great antidote to disbelief in God.

Maybe your child has read about the various evils in the world and is wondering how God could allow such evil to exist or doesn’t correct it when it occurs. Explain to your child that part of love is giving someone free will to choose to serve God or not, because love coerced is not love at all. Analogously, you can tell your child that part of your love for him is not keeping him in the house all day, even though he can experience the pain of living in a sinful world as a result of being on his own. That’s part of growing up, and to confine him instead to your home until he’s of age would undoubtedly be unloving, because your child would be ill-prepared to function in the world as an adult.

And remind your child that God can bring great good out of evil. We need look no further than the cross to confirm that (cf. Rom. 8:28).

For various free online resources dealing with questions about God’s existence, click here for materials on atheism.