Fifteen years ago I used to watch a lot of MTV Even back then, when I wasn’t nearly as concerned with moral well-being, I thought many of the videos were pretty bad, filled with images of violence and women-as-props in various stages of undress. Today it’s not only the videos (which on the whole seem worse) but the programs bracketing them that make MTV truly one of the moral black holes of our telecentric culture.
There’s “Real World,” where a bunch of young adults of both sexes living together allow their personality clashes and sexual fireworks to be documented. And “Loveline,” a late-night show where a comedian, a male psychiatrist, a woman of unapparent qualifications (not funny and not a doctor), and a rotating lineup of guest stars sit around fielding sexual questions from phone-callers and a studio audience. Fun is had over explicit and debauched human situations.
Now the diocese of Providence, Rhode Island, has begun advertising for seminarians on MTV. Fr. Marcel Taillon, the vocations director, asked local high-schoolers how the Church could best reach their peers. He said they told him, “We do two things, Father. We surf the net and we watch cable.” One of the commercials features a telephone ringing but no one answering. Fr. Taillon explained that it’s Jesus calling. In its first week the ad drew several responses.
I thought about that last night as I watched MTV for a total of five minutes and saw two commercials. The first one, for a new movie called Varsity Blues: Wide shot of a high-school classroom. Cut to a young man gazing into the air as if thinking deeply. Cut to the typed quiz on his desk. A multiple-choice question is readable: “What do I like best? a. My friends; b. Football; c. Jenny’s breasts.” Cut to an attractive young woman, also ceiling-gazing, a slight smile on her lips. Cut to the question on her quiz: “Who should I sleep with? a. Jason; b. Michael;.c. Dan; d. All of the above.” Cut to another young man, pondering. Cut to his question: “What do I like best? a. Parties; b. Chicks; c. Beer; d. Football parties where there’s lots of chicks and beer.” Quick-cuts follow of several of the movie’s suggestive scenes. End with movie logo and the words “Starts Friday.”
The next commercial was for another MTV show called “Road Rules,” a sort of mobile version of “Real World” where several young people travel together in a motor home in search of adventure on the high road. The new installment takes place in Latin America, and the ad starts with a Hispanic schoolteacher pointing to the word “Duuude” on a chalkboard. Her brown-skinned class dutifully intones “Du-u-u-de.” Next scene, gleeful Mexican children swing a stick at a pinata shaped like the white “Road Rules” motor home. Next come quick-cut images of candles burning, hands folded in prayer and draped with a rosary, then a devotional altar like you’d see in the houses of poor Latin American Catholics: lit candles inside glass jars, a crucifix, an icon of the Virgin Mary with dried flowers around it, and, in the middle of it all, a small model of a white motor home. The superimposed words “Road Rules” fade in.
I tried to imagine the Providence diocese’s phone-ringing commercial for seminarians following these. Maybe an argument can be made. But it seems to me that advertising for priests on MTV is like trolling for fish in a cesspool.