I was recently presented with a topic about which I had never given much thought: someone taking a long time for confession, resulting in other people unable to receive the sacrament because the priest has to leave the confessional.
This is pastoral topic, not one of doctrine, so there is no right or wrong answer or solution. As pastoral circumstances, by definition, can vary from place to place, there is no overall better or worse practice. The following are simply my thoughts as a priest ordained more than thirty years and currently serving as pastor of two small churches in the rural Midwest.
First, a few thoughts for my brother priests. We need to provide convenient and consistent confession times. Regarding consistency, we must begin on time and stay through the scheduled ending time; we never know when a person may come at the last minute. As for convenience, Saturday before the evening Mass is the old standard, but if we have two such Masses in two different places, there may be zero time for confessions at the second place. If possible, we may try to be available for about fifteen minutes at the second church; this would be greatly appreciated by some of the faithful. First Fridays and First Saturdays are good for additional confession times, both to encourage devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and Immaculate Heart of Mary and to provide an easy way for people to make a habit of monthly Confession.
When it comes to the penitent, there may be several reasons for taking longer than usual for confession. For the person going through an unusual (for him) difficulty, or the one who has been away from confession for years, priests know we need to give them time, and those in line will just have to wait. We can gently guide them to leave out extraneous details, but they may have the mental or emotional need to include some such details. On the other hand, if it is the penitent has gone to confession recently and (to be blunt) talks a lot, there is nothing wrong with helping him to stay on the track of simply naming sins without lengthy background information. In all of these situations, we can invite the person to make an appointment and tell him we will be glad to take more time with him.
To facilitate such appointments, I encourage my brother priests to give out their cell number freely, including having it in the parish bulletin and on the parish website. I know some priests think this is problematic, but I think such worries are unfounded. For more than a dozen years, I was a full-time chaplain at a hospital. I gave out my cell number all the time, including to the patients in the mental health unit. There were only a few occasions when I had to block callers, and that is easy to do with the modern smartphone. The same goes for our email address: we should have one in the bulletin and on the website so we can be contacted easily. Again, abuses are easy to redirect to the spam folder, and I don’t think people should have to fill out that annoying online form to arrange an appointment for confession.
My thoughts for penitents who are going to take more than a few minutes can be seen in the above paragraphs. Those who have been away from the sacrament for years may be inspired by the Holy Spirit to go to confession without having planned, and they should feel free to take more than the average amount of time. The same goes for the person in some kind of spiritual crisis. On the other hand, they may feel more comfortable making an appointment and knowing that the hour with the priest is theirs, with no line waiting outside the door. For those who go routinely, keep in mind the idea of confessing mortal sins in kind and number, venial sins as desired, and no need for extraneous details.
Finally, we look at the penitents waiting in line who are becoming annoyed or upset as the minutes tick by, and it becomes clear that they are not going to get to confession this time. Their frustration is understandable: the forgiveness of sins given to us in this sacrament is so great that we cannot help being disappointed if we thought we were about to receive it, only to be turned away as confession time ends and Mass begins. When this happens, they should go to a pew and take a few minutes to make a good act of contrition. They can also add a prayer for the person who has taken a long time in the confessional; we don’t know what he is going through. If they are at Mass and were unable to confess mortal sins, they should not receive Holy Communion; they can make a spiritual Communion, asking God for the grace they would have received.
Resolve to go to Confession the next time that is possible, or at least practical. After leaving the church, get online and look for other times and places for confession.
And don’t be scrupulous. Remember: God is not looking for ways to condemn us. He loves to forgive our sins and to give us grace. A failed attempt to go to the sacrament of confession is still a moment of grace, so don’t turn it into a failed opportunity for patience and charitable thoughts toward a fellow penitent.