Audio only:
Join Jimmy Akin as he untangles the confusion around the Sign of Peace at Mass! He dives into Church law, reveals why the gesture is totally optional in the U.S., debunks myths, and shares fun, touch-free alternatives—including his own surprising Vulcan Salute (with its ancient Jewish roots!). Discover your Christian freedom and why no one should feel pressured. A liberating, eye-opening episode packed with history, humor, and practical tips—perfect for anyone tired of awkward handshakes! Live long and prosper… with peace!
TRANSCRIPT:
Coming Up
There’s a certain moment in the Mass when the priest or deacon says, “Let us offer each other the sign of peace.”
And then . . . something happens.
But a lot of people aren’t sure what is supposed to happen.
A lot of people are confused.
Do you give a handshake to the people around you? Do you just wave at them? Do you smile and nod?
Let’s get into it!
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Howdy, folks!
We’re in our second year of the podcast now, and you can help me keep making this podcast for years to come—and get early access to new episodes—by going to Patreon.com/JimmyAkinPodcast
Introduction
A listener writes:
At the part of Mass when we are supposed to give each other the sign of peace, nobody knows what to do, exactly. Have you noticed that? Nobody wants to shake hands much anymore.
I’ve been trying to think of an acceptable, peaceable sign we can give. Touch-free, friendly, adequate to the purpose. Maybe you could solicit viewer ideas or something. All I’ve been able to come up with is a bird wing thing.
Peace be with you.
And for those listening to the audio version of the podcast, the listener includes an illustration of a hand gesture where you put your two thumbs next to each other so that your hands extend out from this common point like a pair of bird wings.
The listener doesn’t make this explicit, but I suppose that the idea is to make your hands look kind of like a dove since doves are a common symbol of peace.
Well, I’ll be happy to help the listener out!
Other listeners are free to share their ideas in the comments section of wherever they’re listening to the podcast, but I’ll offer you some ideas here as well.
Christian Liberty
First, though, we’ll need to begin at the beginning, and that means taking a look at what the law actually says.
The reason is that we need to understand what the Church doesn’t and doesn’t require.
One of my principles is that I don’t want to limit the freedom of others by imposing my own opinions on them.
So at the end of the video, I’ll tell you what I do at this point in the Mass, but it’s only one option among many.
I’ll tell people what my opinion is, but I won’t present it as something the Church requires. I’ll present it as just one option among others.
It’s important that people who answer questions like this make clear what liberty people have and that they don’t try to impose their own preferences.
St. Paul refers to some individuals in his day that were trying to do this and speaks of
Galatians 2:4, ESV
False brothers secretly brought in—who slipped in to spy out our freedom that we have in Christ Jesus, so that they might bring us into slavery.
So we need to protect our freedom that we have in Christ Jesus and not let somebody trying to impose their personal preferences to deprive us of this freedom.
As Paul later says:
Galatians 5:1, ESV
For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.
Now, in his own, historical context, St. Paul is talking about those who were claiming that you needed to be circumcised and become a Jew in order to be saved, but the same principle applies any time you’re telling someone that they need to do something that the Church doesn’t require.
You’re interfering with the Christian liberty of others, and it’s very important not to do that.
So what does the Church actually require regarding the sign of peace?
The Rite of Peace
The law governing the sign of peace is found in the General Instruction of the Roman Missal or (GIRM), and if you look there, you find that it’s actually in a part of the Mass called “the Rite of Peace.”
This part of the Mass goes all the way back to the beginning, though it has changed forms and been located at different places in the liturgy over time.
Our earliest explicit reference to it is in the First Apology of St. Justin Martyr, which he wrote around A.D. 155, in the mid-second century.
He describes the beginning of the Sunday liturgy this way:
Justin Martyr, First Apology 65-67 (CCC 1345)
On the day we call the day of the sun, all who dwell in the city or country gather in the same place.
The memoirs of the apostles and the writings of the prophets are read, as much as time permits.
When the reader has finished, he who presides over those gathered admonishes and challenges them to imitate these beautiful things.
Then we all rise together and offer prayers for ourselves . . . and for all others, wherever they may be, so that we may be found righteous by our life and actions, and faithful to the commandments, so as to obtain eternal salvation.
When the prayers are concluded we exchange the kiss.
That kiss is the original version of the rite of peace, and it’s changed in several ways since the second century.
The most obvious way it’s changed is that most people don’t use a kiss as the sign of peace anymore.
Kissing plays a different role in our culture, but it was different in the first century.
Kissing was a common way of greeting people, and there are five places in the New Testament where Christians are told to greet each other with “a holy kiss” or “the kiss of love.”
Our culture is different, and greeting customs vary significantly from one nation to another, so the sign of peace takes different forms in different cultures.
A form that I find particularly interesting is used in the Maronite rite. The way they do it, the peace starts with the priest, who puts his hands together in the classic praying hands position and then turns to those around him at the altar.
They touch the outsides of his hands and then, with their hands closed, they go to others who do the same thing.
And so the peace is passed from person to person until it has been exchanged with everyone in the church.
Another thing you’ll note from Justin’s summary is that the sign of peace has been moved to a new location in the Mass. As Justin makes clear, in his day it occurred at the end of the liturgy of the word, after the prayers of the faithful.
However, today in the Roman rite, it occurs during the liturgy of the Eucharist, shortly before Communion.
A few years ago, particularly in the reign of Pope Benedict, there was some discussion about moving it back to the end of the liturgy of the word in the Latin rite, but that’s not how it’s done in most places today.
A Source of Controversy
During the liturgical chaos of the 1990s, the sign of peace became a source of controversy, because some priests began making a huge production out of it.
Some would leave the sanctuary around the altar and go up and down the aisle themselves, shaking hands and hugging all kinds of people.
This prolonged the exchange of peace, and many priests were criticized for turning the act into a spectacle with them acting like a celebrity or politician greeting crowds of fans.
This approach also was criticized for horizontalizing the Mass—that is, putting the focus on man—rather than keeping the worship focused vertically on God.
In subsequent years, the Vatican cracked down on this practice and put limits into the law to ensure an end to these problems.
Current Law
So what does the law say now?
The first reference to the sign of peace is in the General Instruction of the Roman Missal, section 82, which says that after the Lord’s prayer:
- There follows the Rite of Peace, by which the Church entreats peace and unity for herself and for the whole human family, and the faithful express to each other their ecclesial communion and mutual charity before communicating in the Sacrament.
As for the actual sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by the Conferences of Bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. However, it is appropriate that each person, in a sober manner, offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest.
This does two important things for our purposes: First, it says that the manner for the sign of peace to be exchanged is to be established by the Conferences of Bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples.
This means that the question of what we’re supposed to do is to be decided by the national conference of bishops, so we’ll need to come back and see what the U.S. bishops have determined.
It also means that—since the decision is to be made at the conference level—it doesn’t belong anywhere lower than that.
So a local bishop could not make a decision that the sign of peace must be established in a different way in his own diocese.
One reason is that people today move around from one diocese to another so much that the Vatican wants people across the nation to use the same set of rules.
Travelers visiting one diocese wouldn’t know what the local sign of peace is if it changed from one diocese to the next, and that would put them in weird and uncomfortable situations, which the Vatican doesn’t want.
The second thing that this establishes is that it is appropriate that each person, in a sober manner, offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest.
This is directed against the kind of abuses that were occurring in the 1990s where people—especially priests—were going all over the place to exchange the sign of peace.
Here it says that it is appropriate for people to do so in a sober manner and only to those who are nearest.
So no big, flashy shows.
Mass Without a Deacon
The next significant discussion of the sign of peace is in the section of the GIRM that deals with Mass without a deacon. Section 154 of the GIRM says:
- Then the Priest, with hands extended, says aloud the prayer Domine Iesu Christe, qui dixisti (Lord Jesus Christ, who said to your Apostles) and when it is concluded, extending and then joining his hands, he announces the greeting of peace, facing the people and saying, The peace of the Lord be with you always. The people reply, And with your spirit. After this, if appropriate, the Priest adds, Let us offer each other the sign of peace.
The Priest may give the Sign of Peace to the ministers but always remains within the sanctuary, so that the celebration is not disrupted. In the Dioceses of the United States of America, for a good reason, on special occasions (for example, in the case of a funeral, a wedding, or when civic leaders are present), the Priest may offer the Sign of Peace to a small number of the faithful near the sanctuary. According to what has been decided by the Conference of Bishops, all express to one another peace, communion, and charity. While the Sign of Peace is being given, it is permissible to say, The peace of the Lord be with you always, to which the reply is Amen.
The first thing to note is that this does not mandate an individual exchange of the sign of peace.
It directs the priest to say the peace of the Lord be with you always, and the people reply, and with your spirit.
That—right there—is all the rite of peace requires, and we know that because it goes on to say, After this, if appropriate, the priest adds, Let us offer each other the sign of peace.
So the priest only calls for an individual exchange of peace if it is appropriate, and it’s up to the priest to make this determination.
So actually, the individual exchange of a sign of peace is optional. We’ve already fulfilled the essential rite of peace by the verbal dialogue with the priest.
The text then says, the Priest may give the Sign of Peace to the ministers but always remains within the sanctuary, so that the celebration is not disrupted.
This, again, is directed against the big, showy displays that some priests were making during the 1990s. So now that the priest is directed to always remain within the sanctuary, he’s not to go romping all over the church to shake hands with everybody.
The next part of the text is an adaptation that the U.S. bishops have approved for use in this country. It says that in the Dioceses of the United States of America, for a good reason, on special occasions (for example, in the case of a funeral, a wedding, or when civic leaders are present), the Priest may offer the Sign of Peace to a small number of the faithful near the sanctuary.
So this carves out an exception allowing priests in the U.S. to leave the sanctuary in a limited number of situations like funerals, weddings, and when civic leaders are present to exchange the sign of peace with people near the sanctuary, like grieving families, the bride and groom, or the civic leaders in attendance.
Note that this is only to be done for a good reason and on special occasions.
The final bit of this paragraph, which reverts back to what is in the original Latin edition, says, According to what has been decided by the Conference of Bishops, all express to one another peace, communion, and charity. While the Sign of Peace is being given, it is permissible to say, The peace of the Lord be with you always, to which the reply is Amen.
And that’s clearly an idea someone would come up with who was thinking in Latin. In Latin, they need fewer words to express the same content, so Latin statements tend to be long and drawn out, in comparison to English’s greater concision.
In any event, we don’t have a mandate here because the GIRM says it is permissible to say this when you’re exchanging a sign of peace with someone.
It doesn’t say that you have to, and in my experience most people either don’t say anything at all or they just say the single word “Peace.”
Mass with a Deacon
There’s a variation on all this in the section of the GIRM that deals with Mass where a deacon is helping the priest, and—as usual—they let the deacon do some of the lesser things that the priest would do if the deacon isn’t there.
Section 181 of the GIRM states:
- After the Priest has said the prayer for the Rite of Peace and the greeting The peace of the Lord be with you always and the people have replied, And with your spirit, the Deacon, if appropriate, says the invitation to the Sign of Peace. With hands joined, he faces the people and says, Let us offer each other the sign of peace. Then he himself receives the Sign of Peace from the Priest and may offer it to those other ministers who are nearest to him.
So, again the individual exchange of the sign of peace is optional, which is why it says that if appropriate the deacon says the invitation to the sign of peace.
And, again, it’s the priest celebrant who makes that determination.
After the deacon does this, he himself receives the Sign of Peace from the Priest and may offer it to those other ministers who are nearest to him.
So, again, no big shows.
Concelebrated Mass
The next mention of the sign of peace is in the section dealing with a concelebrated Mass where several priests are participating in the Eucharistic prayer. Section 239 of the GIRM states:
- After the Deacon or, in the absence of a Deacon, one of the concelebrants, has given the instruction Let us offer each other the sign of peace, all give one another the Sign of Peace. Those concelebrants nearer the principal celebrant receive the Sign of Peace from him before the Deacon does.
So in the absence of a deacon, one of the priest concelebrants can give the instruction to have an individual exchange of a sign of peace.
Afterward, those concelebrants nearer the principal celebrant receive the Sign of Peace from him before the Deacon does.
This indicates how serious the Vatican is about not making a big production out of the sign of peace. If you’ve got a dozen of priests concelebrating or something, they don’t all exchange a sign of peace with every other priest in attendance.
Instead, those nearer to the principal concelebrant exchange a sign of peace with him, but they don’t all do so.
And they do so before the deacon does, preserving the hierarchy of priest and deacon.
Mass at which Only One Minister Participates
The final mention of the sign of peace is found in the section on Masses at which only one minister participates, that is:
- At a Mass celebrated by a Priest with only one minister to assist him and to make the responses . . . the minister saying the people’s parts if appropriate.
Here, section 266 says:
- After the acclamation at the end of the embolism that follows the Lord’s Prayer, the Priest says the prayer Domine Iesu Christe, qui dixisti (Lord Jesus Christ, who said to your Apostles). He then adds, The peace of the Lord be with you always, to which the minister replies, And with your spirit. If appropriate, the Priest gives the Sign of Peace to the minister.
Once again, the individual exchange of the sign of peace is optional, so If appropriate, the Priest gives the Sign of Peace to the minister, y’know like because the minister is the only other person there.
So big, showy productions aren’t really possible in this case.
That’s It!
And that’s it! That’s all the law says in the GIRM about the individual exchange of the sign of peace.
But wait a minute! you may be saying. Earlier we read that As for the actual sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by the Conferences of Bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples.
So what have the US bishops decided?
Well, as we heard by reading the law in its entirety—with the US adaptations—they haven’t decided anything.
And Rome approved this document and its implementation.
So here in the United States, the law does not require any specific way of exchanging the sign of peace, and so it’s up to the individual to decide how they’re going to do it.
Now, we can infer that they don’t want it to be disruptive, given how much that has been stressed in the documents.
You’ll recall that in section 82 it said that it is appropriate for people to do so in a sober manner and only to those who are nearest.
So it would not be appropriate to leave your pew and go running up and down the aisle sounding air horns as a sign of peace with others.
But beyond that, it’s basically up to you.
As long as you don’t leave your place and act in a sober manner, you can exchange the sign of peace basically however you want.
Some Suggestions
Which gets us back to the original question the listener asked about: What are we supposed to do here?
Basically, whatever you want within the limits I’ve just mentioned.
But I promised you I’d have some suggestions, and here they are.
You could—of course—use the dove-like hand gesture that the listener mentioned, but I don’t think too many people would understand that, so it wouldn’t be my personal choice.
You also could go all the way back to the beginning and use a Kiss—like they did in the second century.
And today you do see some husband-and-wife couples or parents with children kissing at Mass, though that’s not really something that would work for people outside of families at Mass in contemporary American culture.
Pre-Covid, a lot of people did a Handshake, but the listener noted that they were seeking an alternative to that which didn’t involve shaking hands.
And the listener has my sympathies. I don’t like shaking hands, especially in a context like this, because shaking hands in this situation effectively means shaking hands with everyone else they shook hands with, so a whole bunch of people.
I’m a germophobe anyway, and with the Covid virus, the flu, the common cold, and similar pathogens out there, I’d just rather not.
A step down from a handshake would be a Fist Bump.
Fist bumps are what I use when someone really wants to shake my hand and I can’t get out of it without being rude, since it is safer than a handshake, though it still involves touching someone else’s skin.
Another alternative that at least can be safer than a handshake is a Hug, since that way you don’t have to touch the other person’s skin—just their clothes—but not everybody is into hugging, and it’s still a risk if they’re sick.
However, the listener was trying to envision a touch-free gesture, so let’s mention some touch-free options.
If you want to be extra formal, you could always press your hands together—cleverly making them unavailable—and bow. This is a form of greeting commonly used in Thailand, where it’s known as a Wai Bow.
You could also just Bow without pressing your hands together.
Or you could just Nod your head without bowing.
If you want to use your hands, you could Wave as a sign of peace. This is one of the most common things I see people doing with those who aren’t family members at Mass.
Or—if you want to communicate the idea of peace more explicitly, you could use one of your hands to make the Peace Sign that was popular a few decades ago.
I also see a good number of people doing this.
And then, since I promised to tell you what I do, here’s another option. I use all four of my fingers to make a peace sign by giving the Vulcan Salute.
People know this means “Live long and prosper,” and—after all—I do want everyone around me at Mass to live long and to prosper, so it strikes me as a good way to communicate peace with them.
What most people don’t know is that this is an actual liturgical gesture.
In Numbers 6, Aaron and his sons are told to bless the people of Israel by saying:
Numbers 6:24-26, ESV
The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you;
the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.
This is known in the Jewish liturgy as the Birkat Kohanim or Priestly Blessing, and when it’s made in a synagogue today, the priests make exactly the same hand gesture.
The reason is that this makes your hand have three prongs coming up from your palm, and that makes your hand look like the Hebrew letter Shin in the square script.
The letter shin is used for two reasons.
First, to evoke the name Shaddai, which is one of the names of God—particularly in the books of Genesis and Job.
And second, to evoke the word Shalom, which many people know is the Hebrew word for peace.
Jewish priests thus use the shin hand gesture when giving the priestly blessing, only they use both hands when doing so.
Well, as a child, actor Leonard Nimoy saw the priests doing this in the synagogue his family attended—even though he was supposed to have his eyes closed—and, as he explained in 2012:
I was entranced. I learned to do it simply because it seemed so magical.
It was probably 25 years later that I introduced that gesture as a Vulcan greeting in Star Trek, and it has resonated with fans around the world ever since. It gives me great pleasure since it is, after all, a blessing.
Live Long And Prosper,
—Leonard Nimoy
So the shin hand gesture—or Vulcan salute—is already a liturgical gesture associated with blessing and wishing someone peace or shalom.
Very few people know that, but what everybody knows is that it means “Live long and prosper,” which to me is an appropriate sentiment to wish those around me at the sign of peace.
And it seems to be catching on. Lately, I’ve noted people I don’t know making the symbol back to me.
A few weeks ago, I saw something like 4 or 5 people doing it back.
So there are a bunch of options for what you can do for the sign of peace, many of them that don’t involve making skin-to-skin contact.
Personally, I use the shin hand gesture or Vulcan salute, but you do you!
The bishops in this country have decided to leave what you do open, so it’s your choice!
Oh, and one other thing: If you want to signal peace and good will to someone, it’s always helpful to smile.
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Thank you, and I’ll see you next time
Live long and prosper and shalom. Peace.
God bless you always!