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R e v i e w

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This Rock
Volume 15, Number 10
December 2004
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The Healing Touch
In May I attended a counter-rally on the grounds of the Connecticut state capitol to oppose the "gay marriage" event happening on the opposite side of the capitol. While I was glad to be there and would not hesitate to go again, something struck me as odd about the way it was handled.
Political rallies, by their nature, are supposed to involve speeches that excite crowds, full of applause lines and ballyhoo. The speakers at our rally did their best. But there was something fundamentally incongruous about cheering to defeat a measure that has gained political traction because our society is losing its moral bearings, its sense of what is healthy for the human soul. We should not have been pumped up; we should have been sad, resolute, and determined to love our opponents sincerely and in truth.
Chad Thompson, an Evangelical Christian who has overcome same-sex attraction, has written of a more authentically Christian approach to homosexual ministry in Loving Homosexuals as Jesus Would. Thompson tells of his own conversion and the many obstacles facing men and women who might want to overcome their homosexuality. Sadly, too many of these obstacles are placed by Christians more intent on "being right" than loving our homosexual neighbors.
Thompson makes a compelling argument that the anger and condemnation aimed at leaders of the gay agenda cause collateral damage by turning off gays and lesbians who may want to know Christ and overcome same-sex attraction. It is certainly not the only obstacle to therapy for homosexuals, but it is the one that we in the pews have most control over.
Speaking of his own experience and those of fellow ex-gays, Thompson highlights the importance of "healing touch" in helping homosexuals bond appropriately with members of their gender. He offers a helpful survey of the psychological research that indicates that the primary cause of same-sex attraction is a failure to identify as a child with one’s own gender. Typically this stems from a failed relationship with one’s same-sex parent, but it can result as well from a failure to identify with one’s peers (e.g., a boy who can’t keep up in sports) or even from being molested.
Thompson stresses that normal, healthy touch from other men—whether a hug or a handshake or an arm around the shoulder—speaks volumes to a boy in affirming his "maleness" and helps de-sexualize contact with other men. Thompson reports occasions in which being physically affirmed by "real men" had a transforming effect on his own self-perception.
Moreover, Thompson likens the contact of heterosexual male friends to Christ’s healing touch. While many males shy away from contact with even an ex-gay, Thompson says those who reach out and help are very much like Christ reaching out to the lepers whom Jewish law required to shout, "Unclean! Unclean!"
The most challenging chapter of the book, I believe, is the one on "homophobia." Thompson writes as if homophobia arises from political opposition to the aggressive gay agenda and from irrational fears, such as the fear that a gay or ex-gay inevitably will fall in love with me if I befriend him. What is missing from Thompson’s understanding—perhaps because it is missing from his experience—is what I perceive as a natural, even visceral distaste for homosexuality. I believe most heterosexuals have an innate distaste for the idea of same-sex attraction; this would be a God-given repulsion for what the Church describes as "an objective disorder."
The result is that most people, I believe, are what John Derbyshire of National Review has described as the "tolerant homophobe." We feel the natural aversion to homosexuality, but we are polite to and tolerant of homosexuals, even though politically we oppose their agenda and wish for them something better than what they have embraced.
Ultimately, Thompson’s book is a wake-up call for Christians. He summons us to honestly love homosexuals; to open our hearts and our arms to them; to reject gay politics but love gay people in action, not just words; to understand the true psychology of same sex attraction; and to love with an active love that is a true reflection of Christ in our hearts.
When Thompson attends a rally for the gay political agenda, he sets up a table to offer bottles of water as a show of love and concern. He also passes out business cards promoting his conversion call for gays and lesbians at www.inqueery.org. Because he approaches gays with love and compassion, many are quietly receptive to what he offers. That is certainly worth more than applause lines and ballyhoo.
—Jay Dunlap
Loving Homosexuals As Jesus Would: A Fresh Christian Approach
By Chad Thompson
Brazos Press
183 pages
$12.99
ISBN: 1587431211
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