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S o u n d B i t e s
Changing Sexual Orientation
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This Rock
Volume 12, Number 1
 January 2001 
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The American Psychological Association and the American Psychiatric Association say that change is not possible—if you’re homosexual, don’t attempt to develop your heterosexual potential. It’s just not going to work.
The National Association for the Research and Therapy of Homosexuality engages in what we call "reparative" therapy in order to help people overcome a homosexual orientation. When we say "repair," a lot of "gays" get angry—"What do you mean, ‘repair’? Are you trying to repair us like a car?" But we see is that male homosexual behavior itself is a reparative drive, an attempt to repair or compensate for something missing in one’s emotional background.
In almost all cases of male homosexuals we see a poor relationship with the father. Particularly we see a hurt or disappointment—the technical term is a narcissistic injury—concerning the father figure. This means at a critical period when the boy is trying to solidify his masculine identity—he begins to realize that he is a male, anatomically different from his mother and so begins to disidentify from her—he reaches out to the father figure (it could even be an older brother or an uncle).
If the father is distant or detached or critical or emotionally unavailable, it causes the boy to feel a hurt or rejection, and the boy surrenders his masculine striving: He knows he’s a male, he just never feels a part of the world of men.
Homosexual behavior is not about sex. It’s about what we call the three A’s—attention, affection, and approval. A boy has a natural desire to be accepted by men. If he does not feel this affection by the time he reaches early adolescence, this emotional need for approval becomes eroticized, and he begins to experience sexual attraction.
There is also a very high correlation between sexual abuse as a child and homosexuality as an adult man or woman. Especially with lesbians, who often have painful memories of being sexually molested by an older male. In my own practice, a third of the men I have treated remember being sexually molested by an older male.
We [NARTH] found 880 people who have attempted to change, and overall we saw a significant improvement: Thirty-five percent claim to be exclusively or almost exclusively heterosexual at the end, and many more—over fifty percent—had made significant improvement.
Basically, what it comes down to is a third showed no change, a third showed significant improvement, and a third was cured. When you compare that with the results of most other psychological therapies—attempts to change whatever the behavior is—you get about the same percentages: a third unchanged, a third improved, a third cured.
In 1973 the American Psychiatric Association decided to "normalize" homosexuality by declaring it was not a disorder [as held previously] but a normal psychological condition. The architect of that decision was Dr. Robert Spitzer. But since that time Dr. Spitzer has reevaluated his position and now believes that people can change. He is conducting an important study to document individuals who have come out of homosexuality, and it’s my understanding he has over one hundred such individuals at this point.
If someone you love tells you he or she is "gay" and seeks your acceptance, that person will not respect you any more if he or she sees you compromising your fundamental religious or philosophical convictions. What you would be doing in "accepting" their lifestyle is going along with their delusion. It’s a delusion, this idea that gender is not important or that people of the same sex can get married. It’s not grounded in biology or tradition or faith or anatomical reality. These people want to manipulate the people around them to confirm their fantasy. But you must hold to your truth.
I’ve heard the argument about biblical condemnations of homosexuality, "Well, the authors of the Bible didn’t know about ‘gay’ people, they didn’t know what science knows today about homosexuality, that some people are just naturally ‘gay.’" The fact is, the Bible is still correct. There is no new information that would cause us to change our perception of homosexuality in accordance with traditional Judeo-Christian teaching.
— Joseph Nicolosi
This article is based on a recent "Catholic Answers Live" show with Dr. Joesph Nicolosi, who holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is executive director of the National Association for the Research and Therapy of Homosexuality. More information may be obtained from the NARTH web site (www.narth.com). Audiotapes of the entire show are available from Catholic Answers (item CA-1098). To order, call 1-800-291-8000. For a calendar of shows and a list of radio affiliates, see page 44.
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